22.10.2005<\/p>\n
DI\u015eARIDA HAYATIN \u00fczerine ya\u011fan ramazan\u0131n orta yerinde, bir \u00e7ocuk k\u0131m\u0131ldan\u0131yor kalbimde. Oyuna kar\u0131\u015fan ya\u015f\u0131tlar\u0131n\u0131n d\u0131\u015f\u0131na d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc resmeden bir duvar dibi g\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fcs\u00fcyle… <\/p>\n
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Arkada\u015flar\u0131na kat\u0131l(a)mad\u0131\u011f\u0131 besbelli… Oturdu\u011fu yerde diz \u00e7\u00f6k\u00fcp, di\u015fleriyle elindeki ekmekten bir par\u00e7a par\u00e7a kopart\u0131yor. \u0130\u015ftahla de\u011fil, mecburiyetten gibi… Arkada\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 sarmalayan oyunu uzaktan seyrediyor.<\/p>\n
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Oyuna giremeyen bu \u00e7ocuk oluyorum. Sa\u011f\u0131m\u0131 solumu dolduran insanlar\u0131n elinden tutarak g\u00fczelle\u015ftiren havan\u0131n k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131na d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn h\u00fczn\u00fc \u00e7\u00f6k\u00fcyor \u00fczerime. Arkada\u015flar\u0131m\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131nda u\u00e7u\u015fan, g\u00f6zlerinden giren havay\u0131 soluyamay\u0131\u015f\u0131m\u0131n i\u00e7inden terk edilmi\u015fli\u011fim ge\u00e7iyor. Kullan\u0131mdan kald\u0131r\u0131lm\u0131\u015f eski e\u015fyalar\u0131n ili\u011fine i\u015flemi\u015f vefas\u0131zl\u0131k, ya\u011fmur olup \u00fczerime ya\u011f\u0131yor.<\/p>\n
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Ramazan\u2019\u0131n c\u00fcmb\u00fc\u015fe \u00e7evirdi\u011fi hayatlar\u0131n ortas\u0131nda, k\u0131y\u0131ya d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f \u00e7ocuklar\u0131n r\u00fcyalar\u0131nda yak\u0131n bir tarihe d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyorum. Masallar\u0131n i\u00e7inden ge\u00e7mi\u015f \u015fehrin bir semtinde, vaktin ak\u015fama kayd\u0131\u011f\u0131 saatlerde, kendimi semt sakinlerinin iftar \u00f6ncesi foto\u011fraflar\u0131na bakarken buluyorum. Kalbimin at\u0131p durdu\u011fu bu havada, bir \u2018turist\u2019 olman\u0131n yak\u0131c\u0131 h\u00fczn\u00fcnde, s\u00fcrg\u00fcnlerin \u015fiiri yaz\u0131l\u0131yor. Atik-Valde\u2019den inen sokaktan ge\u00e7erken \u015fiir ba\u015fl\u0131yor:<\/p>\n
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\u2018Tenha sokakta kald\u0131m oru\u00e7suz ve ne\u015fesiz<\/p>\n
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Yurdun bu iftar\u0131ndan uzak kalman\u0131n gam\u0131<\/p>\n
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Hadsiz ya\u015fatt\u0131 r\u00fbhuma bir gurbet ak\u015fam\u0131.\u2019 <\/p>\n
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A\u015fkla ba\u011fl\u0131 oldu\u011fu, kalbinin g\u00f6kkubesinde \u00e7\u0131nlay\u0131p duran g\u00f6n\u00fcl medeniyetinin sultan\u0131 orucun havas\u0131n\u0131 solumak arzusuyla geldi\u011fi Atik-Valde\u2019de, oyuna girememi\u015fli\u011fin ac\u0131s\u0131ndan ge\u00e7en \u015fair oluyorum. \u0130nsan\u0131n k\u00f6t\u00fc taraf\u0131ndan beslenen g\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fclerin yerini tatl\u0131 bir s\u00fck\u00fbnete b\u0131rakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 ramazan saatlerinde, orucun iftar iskelesine yana\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131 vakitlerde, sokaklarda, huzurdan dalgalar dola\u015f\u0131yor. <\/p>\n
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Biliyorum ki, semt sakinlerinin y\u00fczlerine konmu\u015f s\u00fcz\u00fclm\u00fc\u015fl\u00fck hali, az sonra varacaklar\u0131 iskelede oturacaklar\u0131 iftar sofralar\u0131nda da\u011f\u0131lacak. Oru\u00e7la birlikte kalplerine misafir olan iyili\u011fin kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131, g\u00f6zlerine ili\u015fecek \u0131\u015f\u0131lt\u0131yla alacaklar.<\/p>\n
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Semti, f\u0131r\u0131ndan yeni \u00e7\u0131km\u0131\u015f iftar pidelerinin bu\u011fusu bas\u0131yor. <\/p>\n
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\u0130nsanlar sessizce ge\u00e7iyorlar yan\u0131ba\u015f\u0131mdan. <\/p>\n
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\u2018Bakkalda bekle\u015fen f\u0131kar\u00e2 k\u0131zca\u011f\u0131zlar\u0131\u2019, az sonra at\u0131lacak iftar topunu sezdiriyor. <\/p>\n
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\u00c7ok ge\u00e7meden sokaklar b\u00fct\u00fcn b\u00fct\u00fcn sessizle\u015fiyor; g\u00fcn at\u0131lan topla bitiyor bu semtte. <\/p>\n
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O saatten sonra kerpi\u00e7ten evler, \u0131\u015f\u0131kl\u0131 bir ne\u015fenin i\u00e7ine d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor. <\/p>\n
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Ne m\u00fcthi\u015f bir hazd\u0131r bu!<\/p>\n
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Yaln\u0131z ba\u015f\u0131ma kald\u0131\u011f\u0131m tenha sokaklarda, pay\u0131ma bu insanlara kat\u0131lamaman\u0131n gam\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor. Ruhuma bir gurbet ak\u015fam\u0131n\u0131n karanl\u0131\u011f\u0131 bula\u015f\u0131yor. <\/p>\n
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Koyu bir h\u00fcz\u00fcn i\u00e7inde kal\u0131yorum. <\/p>\n
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Ve teselli oluyor, ruhuma di\u015flerini ge\u00e7iren h\u00fcz\u00fcn. <\/p>\n
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Madem ki, onlara kat\u0131lmamam rahats\u0131z ediyor beni, demek ki, d\u0131\u015far\u0131lara s\u00fcrg\u00fcn edilmi\u015f bir bural\u0131y\u0131m. <\/p>\n
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Bu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnce sa\u00e7lar\u0131m\u0131n \u00fczerinde dola\u015fan bir el oluyor.<\/p>\n
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\u2018Kalk, sahur vakti\u2019 diyen anne sesi geliyor bana, derinden… <\/p>\n
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R\u00fcyadan ve uykudan uyan\u0131yorum. <\/p>\n
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Bir anne eliyle kald\u0131r\u0131lan yorgan\u0131n alt\u0131ndan \u00e7e\u015fmeye uzan\u0131yorum. <\/p>\n
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Gurbetten s\u0131laya d\u00f6nen kalbime sofralar kuruluyor.<\/p>\n
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<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
22.10.2005 DI\u015eARIDA HAYATIN \u00fczerine ya\u011fan ramazan\u0131n orta yerinde, bir \u00e7ocuk k\u0131m\u0131ldan\u0131yor kalbimde. Oyuna kar\u0131\u015fan ya\u015f\u0131tlar\u0131n\u0131n d\u0131\u015f\u0131na d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc resmeden bir duvar dibi g\u00f6r\u00fcnt\u00fcs\u00fcyle… Arkada\u015flar\u0131na kat\u0131l(a)mad\u0131\u011f\u0131 besbelli… Oturdu\u011fu yerde diz \u00e7\u00f6k\u00fcp, di\u015fleriyle elindeki ekmekten bir par\u00e7a par\u00e7a kopart\u0131yor. \u0130\u015ftahla de\u011fil, mecburiyetten gibi… Arkada\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 sarmalayan oyunu uzaktan seyrediyor. Oyuna giremeyen bu \u00e7ocuk oluyorum. Sa\u011f\u0131m\u0131 solumu dolduran insanlar\u0131n elinden […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":33,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[194],"class_list":["post-89878","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-yazarlar"],"yoast_head":"\n