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B\u0130R \u015eARKIDIR sonbahar; ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u015fark\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6yler b\u00fct\u00fcn ayr\u0131nt\u0131lar\u0131yla. Ba\u015fta g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc olmak \u00fczere, b\u00fct\u00fcn varl\u0131klar\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fcnden bir damla g\u00f6zya\u015f\u0131 akar; ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u015fark\u0131s\u0131, g\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131 olur. G\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131, kimilerinde bir ayr\u0131l\u0131k i\u00e7in, kimilerinde ise yokluk i\u00e7in akmaya ba\u015flar. <\/p>\n
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B\u00fct\u00fcn bir \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc, 4 mevsim birden ya\u015far, yery\u00fcz\u00fc. \u0130lk baharda \u00e7ocuklu\u011fumuza do\u011far\u0131z. B\u00fct\u00fcn bir \u00e7ocukluk ve ilk gen\u00e7lik y\u0131llar\u0131m\u0131zda bir bahar co\u015fkusu ya\u015far\u0131z hepimiz. B\u00fct\u00fcn dallar\u0131m\u0131z taze, b\u00fct\u00fcn yapraklar\u0131m\u0131z narindir. Duygular\u0131m\u0131z, hen\u00fcz filizlenmi\u015ftir. Tenimiz ter\u00fctazedir. Her bir kabiliyetimiz, yeniden topra\u011fa d\u00fc\u015fecek tohumlar gibidir. A\u015fk \u015fark\u0131lar\u0131, kula\u011f\u0131m\u0131za ho\u015f gelir. <\/p>\n
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Yaz geldi\u011finde, \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn olgunluk d\u00f6nemindeyizdir. \u0130lk bahar\u0131m\u0131zda dev\u015firdi\u011fimiz, ekti\u011fimiz her kabiliyetin, her duygunun en verimli hasad\u0131n\u0131 toplar\u0131z yaz mevsimimizde. \u0130nsan olman\u0131n, kemale ermenin en olgun meyvelerini toplar\u0131z \u00f6m\u00fcr a\u011fac\u0131m\u0131zdan. <\/p>\n
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Sonbahar\u0131m\u0131zda, hasat mevsimimiz bitmi\u015ftir. Ya\u015flanmaya ba\u015flar\u0131z. Tenimize d\u00fc\u015fen sonbahar ya\u011fmurlar\u0131, cildimizin taze kalmas\u0131na yetmemi\u015ftir; tenimiz solmaya y\u00fcz tutmu\u015ftur. Yava\u015f yava\u015f, Ayr\u0131l\u0131k \u015fark\u0131lar\u0131 dinlemeye ba\u015flar\u0131z. \u00d6l\u00fcm fikri, uzaktan \u00e7al\u0131nan bir davulun sesi gibi ho\u015f gelemez kula\u011f\u0131m\u0131za. Haddizat\u0131nda biz de \u00f6l\u00fcm fikrinden ziyade uza\u011f\u0131z sonbahar\u0131m\u0131zda. \u0130\u00e7imizi, h\u00fczn\u00fcn kara bulutlar\u0131 kaplar. \u00d6l\u00fcm, sonbahar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n f\u0131rt\u0131nalar koparan fikri olur. Her g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn takviminden bir yaprak d\u00fc\u015fer hayat\u0131m\u0131zdan; b\u00fct\u00fcn bir \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn d\u00fc\u015fen yapraklar\u0131, tek bir sonbaharda d\u00fc\u015fer yer y\u00fcz\u00fcne. Her bir g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn yapraklar\u0131n\u0131, hazan mevsiminde ayaklar alt\u0131na d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f a\u011fa\u00e7 yapraklar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u00fcz. Her bir yaprak sararm\u0131\u015f haliyle, y\u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fcn \u2018bir g\u00fcn\u2019\u00fcn\u00fc, \u2018bir an\u2019\u0131n\u0131 yans\u0131tan bir aynaya d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr.<\/p>\n
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Yolun sonuna geldi\u011fimizde, k\u0131\u015f mevsimine gireriz. \u2018Bir g\u00fcn bizim de ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131za karlar ya\u011facak.\u2019 Sa\u00e7lar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n beyazl\u0131\u011f\u0131, \u00f6l\u00fcm kefeninin beyazl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 and\u0131r\u0131r. Yer y\u00fcz\u00fc karlarla dolsa, \u2018yer y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn de kefeni varm\u0131\u015f\u2019 diye hay\u0131flan\u0131r\u0131z. Her d\u00fc\u015fen beyaz k\u0131l\u0131m\u0131z\u0131, bize \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fc hat\u0131rlatan bir \u00f6l\u00fcm mele\u011fi san\u0131r\u0131z. En sonunda, \u00f6l\u00fcm mele\u011fi, bizi de beyazlara b\u00fcr\u00fcnd\u00fcr\u00fcr, ikinci bahar\u0131m\u0131zda tekrar diriltilmek \u00fczere, berzah alemi\u2019ne g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcr; ait oldu\u011fumuz topra\u011fa kavu\u015furuz. Ruhlar\u0131m\u0131z berzahta iken, bedenimiz, k\u0131\u015f\u0131n b\u00fct\u00fcn so\u011fuklu\u011funu ya\u015far toprak alt\u0131nda. \u2018Ha\u015frin bahar\u0131nda, yeniden dirilme fikri\u2019, berzah\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 cennet bah\u00e7elerinin s\u0131cakl\u0131\u011f\u0131na kavu\u015fturur. Bedenimiz, so\u011fuk ve incecik bir kefenin i\u00e7inde \u00e7\u00fcr\u00fcrken, ruhumuz, meleklerle beraber yery\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc dola\u015f\u0131r. <\/p>\n
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\u0130lk baharda kavu\u015fman\u0131n ne\u015fesiyle dolup ta\u015fan her \u00e7i\u00e7ek, a\u011fa\u00e7, bulut, g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc, g\u00f6revini yapman\u0131n huzuruyla ayr\u0131l\u0131r bu alemden. G\u00f6rev ba\u015f\u0131nda, O\u2019nun g\u00fczelli\u011fini sergileyen her \u015fey, solup giderken de yine O\u2019nun izniyle ayr\u0131l\u0131yor alemimizden. Yapraklar solgun, ama asla yoklu\u011fa gidi\u015fin renklerini yans\u0131tm\u0131yor. <\/p>\n
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Sararm\u0131\u015fl\u0131\u011f\u0131n b\u00fct\u00fcn tonlar\u0131n\u0131 yans\u0131tan rengarenk yapraklar, giderken, zihinlerimizde renkli h\u00fcz\u00fcnlere yerlerini b\u0131rak\u0131yor, bir daha bulu\u015fmak \u00fczere. \u0130lk bahar\u0131n rengarenk \u00e7i\u00e7eklerini aratmayacak bir g\u00fczellikle, ok\u015far g\u00f6zlerimizi. Ayr\u0131l\u0131k \u00e7i\u00e7ekleri\u2019nin g\u00fcl bah\u00e7esinde hissederiz kendimizi. \u00c7i\u00e7eklerin, zihinlerimizde b\u0131rakt\u0131klar\u0131 varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n co\u015fkusu, yerini ayr\u0131l\u0131k h\u00fczn\u00fcne terk ediyor. Dal\u0131ndaki \u00e7i\u00e7ekler, solmu\u015f yapraklara d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr sonbahar meydan\u0131nda. Yapraklar, sonbahar \u00e7i\u00e7ekleri a\u00e7ar, kasvetli y\u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fcze tebess\u00fcm ederek, y\u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc g\u00fcld\u00fcr\u00fcr. <\/p>\n
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Bir estetik, bir zerafetle; sal\u0131na sal\u0131na, d\u00f6ne d\u00f6ne a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 b\u0131rak\u0131r kendini, dal\u0131ndan her bir yaprak, sema canibinden iner yer y\u00fcz\u00fcne. Sanki g\u00f6revli melekler, vazifesini bitirmi\u015f yapraklar\u0131n cenazelerini, sayg\u0131yla yer y\u00fcz\u00fc mezarl\u0131\u011f\u0131na indirir. Sokaklar, yapraklar\u0131n cenazeleriyle dolup ta\u015far. Onlar\u0131n cenazelerine sayg\u0131s\u0131zca ve onlar\u0131n vazifelerinin biti\u015fini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeden basanlar\u0131n ayaklar\u0131 alt\u0131nda, topra\u011fa kavu\u015fur yapraklar. Toprakla b\u00fct\u00fcnle\u015fir. Geldi\u011fi yere, ait oldu\u011fu memleketine gider. Bir daha yeniden diriltilmek \u00fczere, kim bilir hangi a\u011fac\u0131n hangi dal\u0131na yaprak, hangi \u00e7i\u00e7e\u011fin hangi s\u00fcmb\u00fcl\u00fc, hangi insan\u0131n hangi g\u00f6zbebe\u011fine bir zerre olur yapraklar. <\/p>\n
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Bir zamanlar, dile gelmi\u015fti, ilk bahar\u0131n \u015fark\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6ylemi\u015fti yapraklar. Her bir yaprak, ait oldu\u011fu a\u011fac\u0131n y\u00fczlerce dili olmu\u015ftu bir zamanlar. A\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131n her bir yapra\u011f\u0131ndan ayr\u0131 bir musiki, ayr\u0131 bir name terenn\u00fcm eylemi\u015fti. Varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n, kavu\u015fman\u0131n, co\u015fkunun \u015fark\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 seslendirmi\u015flerdi. \u2018Binler dilleriyle, havan\u0131n dokunmas\u0131yla, Hu Hu zikrini tekrarl\u0131yorlar\u2019d\u0131. Ve varl\u0131klar\u0131yla hayat\u0131 Bah\u015feden\u2019i \u2018Ya Hayy\u2019(Ey dirilten\u2019) diye anlat\u0131yorlard\u0131. \u0130\u015fte \u015fimdi de yine O\u2019na \u015f\u00fckrederek, ba\u015fka bir aleme gidi\u015fin, ba\u015fka bir g\u00f6reve gidi\u015fin merasimini bitirmek \u00fczere, \u2018Ya M\u00fcmit\u2019(Ey \u00d6ld\u00fcren!) diyerek hayata veda ediyorlar. \u015eimdi de ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u015fark\u0131s\u0131\u2019n\u0131 seslendiriyorlar.<\/p>\n
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O\u2019nun varl\u0131\u011f\u0131na, her yerden ko\u015fup gelmi\u015f olan yapraklar, O\u2019nun varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ve g\u00fczelli\u011fini yans\u0131t\u0131yorlard\u0131. \u015eimdi de yine O\u2019nun hala var oldu\u011funu ve var olmaya devam etti\u011fini giderek g\u00f6steriyorlar. O\u2019nun izniyle gelmi\u015flerdi, yine O\u2019nun izniyle gidiyorlar. <\/p>\n
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\u0130lkbaharda, yapraklarla \u015fenlenen dallar, cazibeli bir nazenin gibi, cezbe istiyorlard\u0131. \u2018A\u015fk\u0131n “Hay Huy” perdelerinden en hassas tellere, damarlara dokunuyor gibi sad\u00e2 veriyorlar.\u2019d\u0131. Kendilerine bakanlara, nazl\u0131 nazl\u0131 sal\u0131n\u0131yorlard\u0131; g\u00f6zlerini ok\u015fuyorlard\u0131; ama \u015fimdi kendisine ait cazibesini yitirmi\u015f ma\u015fuk gibi, solmu\u015f ve a\u015fka veda ediyorlar. <\/p>\n
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Etraf\u0131 \u00e7i\u00e7eksiz, z\u00fcl\u00fcfleri yapraks\u0131z kalan a\u011fa\u00e7lar, kuru dallar\u0131yla, yerde yatan yapraklar\u0131n cenaze namaz\u0131na haz\u0131rl\u0131k yap\u0131yorlar. Kimi yerlere yatm\u0131\u015f, secdede; kimi ruku\u2019da, kimi de ayakta; birazdan ilkbahar\u0131n cenaze namaz\u0131n\u0131 k\u0131lacaklar. Kendileri de k\u0131\u015f\u0131n gurbetine erecekler. <\/p>\n
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\u0130\u015fte tesbihlerini yapan a\u011fa\u00e7lar, \u2018kurumu\u015f kemikler\u2019 misali, bir sonraki baharda yeniden yarat\u0131lmak \u00fczere, \u2018yeniden yarat\u0131lmaya inanmayanlara, yeniden yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u0131n var oldu\u011funu, hakk oldu\u011funu\u2019 \u0131spatlamak \u00fczere uykuya yatacaklar. Uykuda bile, \u2018yeniden yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u2019\u0131n varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 \u0131spatlamak i\u00e7in dim dik ayaktalar. Ayakta olu\u015flar\u0131, varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n devam etti\u011fini, yoklu\u011fun asla olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131, \u2018yeniden dirili\u015f\u2019in onlar \u00fczerinden yeniden m\u00fcmk\u00fcn oldu\u011funu g\u00f6steriyor. <\/p>\n
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\u2018Kurumu\u015f kemikleri kim diriltecek?\u2019 sorusunu, kurumu\u015f kemik gibi dallar\u0131yla, ha\u015frin bahar\u0131nda tekrar yarat\u0131lacaklar\u0131n\u0131 \u0131spatl\u0131yorlar. G\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc, yaprak d\u00f6k\u00fcm\u00fcne a\u011flay\u0131p g\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131 d\u00f6kse de, bir ba\u015fka baharda yeniden yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u0131 selamlamaktan geri durmuyor; yeniden yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f i\u00e7in, kuruyan a\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131 sulay\u0131p, yeniden dirili\u015fin m\u00fcmk\u00fcn oldu\u011funu kendi diliyle anlat\u0131yor ve kuru bedene b\u00fcr\u00fcnm\u00fc\u015f nazeninlere \u2018saki\u2019(a\u015fk \u015farab\u0131n\u0131 dolduran) lik yapmaya devam ediyor. <\/p>\n
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\u2018Yeniden yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u2019a inamay\u0131p g\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131 d\u00f6kenler de, kurumu\u015f a\u011fa\u00e7lara bakarken sadece bahar\u0131n sona ermesine a\u011flam\u0131yor; ayn\u0131 zamanda yer y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc ye\u015fillendiren b\u00fct\u00fcn varl\u0131k aleminin yok olu\u015funa, akrabalar\u0131n\u0131n, dostlar\u0131n\u0131n, arkada\u015flar\u0131n\u0131n, anne ve babalar\u0131n\u0131n da sona eren veya erecek olan \u00f6m\u00fcrlerine a\u011fl\u0131yor. Yoklu\u011fa a\u011fl\u0131yor, \u00f6l\u00fcme a\u011fl\u0131yor; bahar\u0131 tutmak i\u00e7in elinden hi\u00e7bir \u015fey gelmeyen iradesine, varl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n da bir g\u00fcn sona erece\u011fine a\u011fl\u0131yor. Kendisi ya\u015fasa bile, bir yapra\u011f\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcne a\u011fl\u0131yor, milyonlarca milyarlarca a\u011fac\u0131n, bitki ve hayvanlar\u0131n yok olu\u015funa a\u011fl\u0131yor. G\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fcnden akan ya\u011fmurlar, onun g\u00f6z\u00fcnde yoklu\u011fa a\u011flamalard\u0131r. R\u00fczgar\u0131n esmesiyle a\u011fa\u00e7lardan, dallardan y\u00fckselen ayr\u0131l\u0131k \u015fark\u0131s\u0131, onlar\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fcnde, yoklu\u011fun cenaze mar\u015f\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. G\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc bulutland\u0131\u011f\u0131nda, i\u00e7i h\u00fcz\u00fcnlenir, ruhu s\u0131k\u0131l\u0131r, rahmet y\u00fckl\u00fc bulutlar, onlar\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fcnde d\u00fc\u015fmana d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr. Kocaman yer y\u00fcz\u00fc, kocaman g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc onun nazar\u0131nda, bir hapishanenin kapan\u0131 gibi, kendisini bu geni\u015f alemde daralm\u0131\u015f hisseder. <\/p>\n
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Gurbet bile yoktur b\u00f6yle birinin hayat\u0131nda. Zira ba\u015fka bir yerden geldi\u011fine inanmamaktad\u0131r. Gurbet fikri ise, bir yerden geldi\u011fini, buraya ait olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ve bir g\u00fcn gurbetin bitece\u011fini hissettirir insana. \u2018Yeniden yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u2019a inanmayan\u0131n, gurbeti de yoktur. Ne ilk bahar\u0131 ne de sonbahar\u0131 yoktur. Ne \u2018kavu\u015fma\u2019 fikri vard\u0131r, ne de \u2018ayr\u0131l\u0131k\u2019 fikri. B\u00f6yle birinin sahibi de yoktur. Sahibinden ka\u00e7m\u0131\u015f bir k\u00f6le gibidir, sahipsizlik, yeniden dirili\u015f\u2019e inanmayan\u0131n, en b\u00fcy\u00fck \u0131zd\u0131rap duydu\u011fu fikridir. Ayr\u0131l\u0131k \u015fark\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 dinlerken, ruhu, onulmaz bir yarayla yaralanmaktad\u0131r. Ve ayr\u0131l\u0131k \u015fark\u0131lar\u0131, onun i\u00e7in yokluk \u015fark\u0131lar\u0131\u2019na d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr.<\/p>\n
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Maddi olarak et ve kemikten ibaren olan insan, sahip oldu\u011fu manevi duygular\u0131yla bu aleme yabanc\u0131d\u0131r; ba\u015fka bir alemden buraya g\u00f6nderilmi\u015ftir ve tekrar oraya g\u00f6nderilecektir. Hem ya\u015fayan canl\u0131 alem, hem de bunun insan\u0131n manevi duygular\u0131ndaki yans\u0131mas\u0131 bunun en canl\u0131 \u015fahididir. <\/p>\n
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Yeniden yarat\u0131l\u0131\u015f fikri, \u2018ayr\u0131l\u0131k ac\u0131s\u0131\u2019n\u0131, \u00fcmitsizlik buhran\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrmeden, tatl\u0131 bir h\u00fczne d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015ft\u00fcrmektedir. B\u00f6ylece ayr\u0131l\u0131k \u015fark\u0131lar\u0131, sevgilisinden ge\u00e7ici olarak ayr\u0131lan a\u015f\u0131k\u0131n, kavu\u015fma heyecan\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fmektedir. Ayr\u0131l\u0131k, tatl\u0131 bir h\u00fczn\u00fcn g\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131 olarak akar kalbimize. Y\u00fcre\u011fimiz, O\u2019nun sevgisiyle \u0131slan\u0131r. Ve h\u00fcz\u00fcnl\u00fc \u015fark\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6ylerken, sonbahar, tatl\u0131 bir g\u00f6zya\u015f\u0131 olur\u2026 <\/p>\n
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31.10.2005 B\u0130R \u015eARKIDIR sonbahar; ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u015fark\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6yler b\u00fct\u00fcn ayr\u0131nt\u0131lar\u0131yla. Ba\u015fta g\u00f6ky\u00fcz\u00fc olmak \u00fczere, b\u00fct\u00fcn varl\u0131klar\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fcnden bir damla g\u00f6zya\u015f\u0131 akar; ayr\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u015fark\u0131s\u0131, g\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131 olur. G\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131, kimilerinde bir ayr\u0131l\u0131k i\u00e7in, kimilerinde ise yokluk i\u00e7in akmaya ba\u015flar. B\u00fct\u00fcn bir \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc, 4 mevsim birden ya\u015far, yery\u00fcz\u00fc. \u0130lk baharda \u00e7ocuklu\u011fumuza do\u011far\u0131z. B\u00fct\u00fcn bir \u00e7ocukluk ve ilk gen\u00e7lik […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[176],"class_list":["post-89433","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-yazarlar"],"yoast_head":"\n