25.10.2005<\/p>\n
O VARMI\u015e, yok yokmu\u015f.<\/p>\n
Ezel zaman d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda ebed kalbin i\u00e7indeymi\u015f.<\/p>\n
Yarat\u0131klardan \u00f6te, ama her \u015feyden yak\u0131n, bir sultan varm\u0131\u015f. Bu sultan\u0131n bir de, g\u00f6zlerin hi\u00e7 g\u00f6rmedi\u011fi, hayalin tahattur bile edemedi\u011fi, ak\u0131llara s\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015fmayan g\u00fczellikte bir b\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fc varm\u0131\u015f.<\/p>\n
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Sultan bir g\u00fcn b\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcne, h\u00fckmetti\u011fi \u00e2lemleri g\u00f6stererek \u201cB\u00fct\u00fcn bu \u00e2lemleri senin i\u00e7in besteledim. Git, gez \u00e2lemlerimi de o besteyi bana oku. Ben de kendi bestemi senin sesinden dinleyeyim.\u201d der ve b\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fc u\u00e7urur varl\u0131k \u00e2lemlerine.<\/p>\n
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B\u00fclb\u00fcl \u00e2lemlerde bestelenen b\u00fct\u00fcn sadalar\u0131 dinler. Seman\u0131n e\u015fsiz derinliklerinde devasa notalarla kusursuzca nazmedilmi\u015f manzumeleri okur. \u00dczerine milyarlar y\u0131ld\u0131z \u015febnemleri kondurulmu\u015f galaksi g\u00fcllerinden bir demet musika-i ilahi dev\u015firir. Vecd ve \u015fevk ile \u00e2lemleri seyrederken g\u00f6z\u00fcne k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck bir gezegen ili\u015fir ve merak\u0131 onu oraya cezb eder. D\u00fcnyay\u0131 ba\u015ftan ba\u015fa dola\u015f\u0131r ve dinledi\u011fi e\u015fsiz besteler kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda hayranl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 gizleyemez. Hele bir tanesi onu kendinden ge\u00e7irir. Seher vaktinin serinli\u011finde helezonik \u015febnem notalar\u0131yla bezenmi\u015f kadife sayfal\u0131 g\u00fcl g\u00fcftesini g\u00f6r\u00fcnce, t\u00fcm \u00e2lemin o g\u00fclde bestelendi\u011fini farkeder. Sultan\u0131n\u0131n e\u015fsiz sanat\u0131 kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda secdeye kapan\u0131p\u00a0\u201cSenin sanat\u0131n seni en g\u00fczel \u015fekilde \u00f6vmekte, ben seni lay\u0131k\u0131yla \u00f6vemem.\u201d<\/b>\u00a0der. Sonra beste yerine sultan\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcrmek \u00fczere o Muhammed\u00ee g\u00fcl\u00fc dal\u0131ndan kopar\u0131p efendisine g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcr. Ve ona, \u201cSana b\u00fct\u00fcn k\u00e2inat\u0131n bestesini getirdim, ben bundan daha m\u00fckemmel beste dinlemedim. Senin sanat\u0131n\u0131 bu G\u00dcLden daha g\u00fczel besteleyen ne olabilir ki?\u201d diye arz-\u0131 hal eder.<\/p>\n
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Sultan tebess\u00fcm eder b\u00fclb\u00fcle. Ve ona \u201cBu g\u00fcl benim aynamd\u0131r. Kim ona bakarsa beni b\u00fct\u00fcn ha\u015fmetimle g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f olur. Halbuki ben g\u00f6r\u00fcnmez bir hazineyim. Hazinenin anahtar\u0131 da bu g\u00fclde sakl\u0131d\u0131r. Ve sen ey b\u00fclb\u00fcl, bu g\u00fcl\u00fcn okudu\u011fu bestesin. Kim sana kulak verirse g\u00fcl destesinin bestesini benden i\u015fitmi\u015f gibi olur. Ben g\u00fclde kendimi seyreder sende de esma ve s\u0131fatlar\u0131m\u0131 sergilerim. B\u00f6ylece senin g\u00f6z\u00fcnde kendimi seyrederim. G\u00f6ren de ben, i\u015fiten de benim. B\u00fct\u00fcn g\u00f6rmeler ve i\u015fitmeler bendendir.<\/p>\n
Hadi \u015fimdi git, bu g\u00fcl\u00fc nas\u0131l besteledi\u011fimi g\u00f6r ve g\u00fcle \u00e2\u015f\u0131k b\u00fclb\u00fcleri bul ve bana \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r.\u00a0Zira her g\u00fclde g\u00f6r\u00fcnen benim ve her b\u00fclb\u00fcl beni besteler.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n
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B\u00fclb\u00fcl u\u00e7a u\u00e7a d\u00fcnyaya ula\u015f\u0131r. Fakat bu kez g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc manzara onu \u015fa\u015f\u0131rt\u0131r. Buras\u0131 \u00f6l\u00fcler diyar\u0131 olsa gerek, g\u00fczellikten pek nasibi olmami\u015f galiba diye d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnerek yere al\u00e7al\u0131r. Gide gide bir mezarl\u0131g\u0131n i\u00e7ine girer kuru bir dal\u0131n \u00fczerine t\u00fcneyerek etraf\u0131n\u0131 seyretmeye ba\u015flar. Manzara ger\u00e7ekten de etkiler onu. Mevsimlerden k\u0131\u015f ve her \u015fey b\u00fct\u00fcn g\u00fczelliklerinden soyulmu\u015f haliyle \u00e7\u0131r\u0131l\u00e7\u0131plak durur b\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcn \u00f6n\u00fcnde.<\/p>\n
Topra\u011f\u0131n ye\u015filden mahrum karas\u0131, semadaki bulutlar\u0131n karalar \u00fcst\u00fcne d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f karas\u0131, a\u011fa\u00e7lar\u0131n iskeletlere d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f haliyle birlikte mezarta\u015flar\u0131n\u0131n yosun tutmu\u015f karalt\u0131s\u0131 etrafa kasavetli bir hava kat\u0131yordu. Kimsesizlik, yoksulluk ve yosunluk b\u00fct\u00fcn her yeri kaplam\u0131\u015ft\u0131.<\/p>\n
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H\u00fcz\u00fcnlenir b\u00fclb\u00fcl yoksullu\u011fun ve yoksunlu\u011fun ac\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 ta y\u00fcre\u011finde hisseder. G\u00f6zleri mezarlar\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnde gezerken kula\u011f\u0131na derinden bir tak\u0131m sesler gelir. Bir an g\u00f6z\u00fcndeki perde kald\u0131r\u0131l\u0131r ve topra\u011f\u0131n alt\u0131nda yatan tohumlar\u0131 farkeder. \u0130yice kulak verdi\u011finde o seslerin tohumlar\u0131n kalplerinin hayk\u0131r\u0131\u015f\u0131 oldu\u011funu anlar. Hayat sahnesine \u00e7\u0131kma arzusunun ifadesi olan \u201cvucut vucut\u201d sadalar\u0131n\u0131 i\u015fitir.<\/p>\n
B\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcn kalbindeki h\u00fcz\u00fcn iyice derinle\u015fir ve y\u00fcre\u011fi o acizlere kar\u015f\u0131 s\u0131n\u0131rs\u0131z bir \u015fefkatle dolar. Onlar\u0131n kalbinde a\u015fk-\u0131 bekay\u0131 okur ve lisan\u0131 \u201cyokluktan varl\u0131\u011fa \u00e7\u0131k\u0131\u015f\u201d bestesini terenn\u00fcm eder.<\/p>\n
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B\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcn ac\u0131 ac\u0131 inleyi\u015fi \u00e2lemi h\u00fczne bo\u011far b\u00fct\u00fcn \u00e2lem, \u201cEvet evet evet biz de istiyoruz ey sultan\u0131m\u0131z.\u201d diye hayk\u0131r\u0131r semaya. Derken kara bulutlar seman\u0131n y\u00fcz\u00fcnden \u00e7ekilir, g\u00fcne\u015f g\u00fcl\u00fcmser varl\u0131klar\u0131n y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcne. Kasavetli da\u011flar\u0131n y\u00fcre\u011findaki buzlar \u00e7\u00f6z\u00fcl\u00fcr, \u0131rmak \u0131rmak ya\u015flar ak\u0131t\u0131r ovaya. \u0130\u00e7indeki varl\u0131k co\u015fkusu ta\u015far, g\u00fcne\u015fin ellerinde ula\u015f\u0131r semaya.<\/p>\n
Ve semay\u0131 bu kez rahmet bulutlar\u0131 sarar. B\u00fclb\u00fcl vecde gelir bu kez de \u201chayat\u201d bestesini i\u015fttirir bullutlara. B\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcn ho\u015f na\u011fmesiyle \u00e7o\u015fan bulutlar \u015fim\u015fekler \u00e7akarak rad ile konu\u015fturur semay\u0131. Ab-\u0131 hayat\u0131 k\u0131z\u0131\u015ft\u0131r\u0131r. Kara topra\u011f\u0131n \u00f6l\u00fc bedenine hayat \u00f6p\u00fcc\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fc kondurur. Tohumlar\u0131n y\u00fcre\u011fine dokunur hayat. Baharla ye\u015fil ye\u015fil g\u00fcl\u00fcmser d\u00fcnya. Yana\u011f\u0131na pempe \u00e7i\u00e7ekler kondurur. Fakir toprak fahr eder sultan\u0131n ikram\u0131yla. Fakr\u0131 fahr olur, bahar\u0131n g\u00fcl\u00fcmseyen y\u00fcz\u00fcnde okunur.<\/p>\n
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Bu sefer a\u015fk\u0131n bestesini seslendirir b\u00fclb\u00fcl \u015fevkle. Y\u00fcre\u011fi lisan\u0131nda dillenir. \u00c7i\u00e7eklerin \u00e2\u015f\u0131klar\u0131 doldurur \u00e2lemi, kelebekler latif \u00f6p\u00fcc\u00fckler kondurur bahara. Ar\u0131lar muhabbeti dokur bal dudaklarda. Ve g\u00fcl bahara g\u00fcl\u00fcmser. B\u00fclb\u00fcl hayran olur. Kalbinin kan\u0131yla boyar onu. \u00c2lemi onunla g\u00fcld\u00fcr\u00fcr.<\/p>\n
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Derken bir insan gelir d\u00fcnyaya. Ellinde g\u00f6n\u00fcl sepeti. Sald\u0131r\u0131r etrafa. Elinde neyi tutarsa soldurur. Sepetine s\u0131\u011fd\u0131ramaz \u00e2lemi. Y\u00fcre\u011fini \u0131ss\u0131z \u00e7\u00f6le d\u00f6nd\u00fcr\u00fcr.<\/p>\n
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Ve b\u00fclb\u00fcl \u201cbeka\u201d bestesini okur g\u00fcl\u00fcn ba\u015f\u0131nda. \u0130nsan, \u201cEvet, i\u015fte benim bestem.\u201d Der, y\u00f6nelir g\u00fcle do\u011fru. G\u00fcl g\u00fcl\u00fcmser insana. \u0130nsan g\u00fclde b\u00fct\u00fcn \u00e2lemleri g\u00f6r\u00fcr. B\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcn terenn\u00fcm etti\u011fi b\u00fct\u00fcn na\u011fmeleri, m\u00fccessem halde g\u00fcl\u00fcn y\u00fcz\u00fcnde okur. Tohum olur, g\u00fcl ve b\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcn na\u011fmesiyle k\u00e2inat \u00e7\u0131kar i\u00e7inden. Ve insan, sesin geldi\u011fi y\u00f6ne bakar. B\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fc farkeder. B\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcn t\u00fcyleri renkten renge b\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fcr dev bir z\u00fcmr\u00fcd-i anka g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr ona. \u0130nsan, \u201cYa baki!\u201d der ve ankan\u0131n s\u0131rt\u0131na biner. Tam ku\u015f u\u00e7acakken insan g\u00fcle uzan\u0131r. Ba\u015f\u0131na ta\u00e7 yapar onu. Ku\u015f u\u00e7ar semaya, insan da ula\u015f\u0131r en son noktaya. Sunar tac\u0131n\u0131 sultan\u0131na. Ve sultan g\u00fcl\u00fcmser ona.<\/p>\n
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|8G\u00fcller, son defa yaz\u0131lsa bahara<\/p>\n
B\u00fclb\u00fcller son defa dokunsa kula\u011fa<\/p>\n
Kelebekler son kez kanatlansa semaya<\/p>\n
G\u00fcne\u015f son kez veda etse d\u00fcnyaya<\/p>\n
Ve bak\u0131\u015f\u0131n, son bak\u0131\u015f olsa bana<\/p>\n
\u0130stemem asla istemem derim<\/p>\n
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G\u00fcller hi\u00e7 solmas\u0131n isterim<\/p>\n
B\u00fclb\u00fcller asla susmas\u0131n derim<\/p>\n
Varl\u0131\u011f\u0131ysa \u00f6lesiye severim<\/p>\n
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Ben bekan\u0131n \u00e2\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131y\u0131m dostlar<\/p>\n
Fani sevmeler benim neyime<\/p>\n
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Bekas\u0131 olmayan a\u015fklar beni soldurur<\/p>\n
\u015eu fani \u00f6mr\u00fcme hep elemler doldurur.<\/p>\n
A\u015eK ANCAK SAH\u0130B\u0130N\u0130 BULURSA G\u00dcLD\u00dcR\u00dcR.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
25.10.2005 O VARMI\u015e, yok yokmu\u015f. Ezel zaman d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda ebed kalbin i\u00e7indeymi\u015f. Yarat\u0131klardan \u00f6te, ama her \u015feyden yak\u0131n, bir sultan varm\u0131\u015f. Bu sultan\u0131n bir de, g\u00f6zlerin hi\u00e7 g\u00f6rmedi\u011fi, hayalin tahattur bile edemedi\u011fi, ak\u0131llara s\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015fmayan g\u00fczellikte bir b\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fc varm\u0131\u015f. Sultan bir g\u00fcn b\u00fclb\u00fcl\u00fcne, h\u00fckmetti\u011fi \u00e2lemleri g\u00f6stererek \u201cB\u00fct\u00fcn bu \u00e2lemleri senin i\u00e7in besteledim. Git, gez \u00e2lemlerimi de o […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":17,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[164],"class_list":["post-88839","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-yazarlar"],"yoast_head":"\n