17.08.2009<\/p>\n
L\u0130SEY\u0130 B\u0130T\u0130R\u0130P \u00dcniversiteli olma heyecan\u0131, gen\u00e7lik enerjisi ve sarho\u015flu\u011fu ile g\u00fcle oynaya eve d\u00f6nmek \u00fczere otob\u00fcse binildi, unutuldu bile g\u00fcn\u00fcn yorgunlu\u011fu, biraz da ne\u015felenmek laz\u0131md\u0131, arabada \u00e7alan m\u00fczi\u011fe e\u015flik edilmeye ba\u015fland\u0131, haydi eller havaya\u2026<\/p>\n
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Birka\u00e7 ki\u015fi ile ba\u015flayan m\u00fczi\u011fe tempo tutma gittik\u00e7e geni\u015fledi, eskimeye y\u00fcz tutmu\u015f otob\u00fcs h\u0131zland\u0131k\u00e7a artt\u0131; dillerde \u015fark\u0131n\u0131n s\u00f6zleri, eller ayn\u0131 ritimle \u015fakl\u0131yor, arada kahkahalar melodiye renklendiriyordu\u2026 Keyfe diyecek bir \u015fey yoktu, \u00f6\u011frencilerle dolu otob\u00fcste kimsenin de bir \u015fey dedi\u011fi yoktu zaten\u2026<\/p>\n
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Hafif rampa \u00e7\u0131k\u0131lm\u0131\u015f yolun yar\u0131s\u0131na gelinmi\u015fti ki otob\u00fcs yava\u015flad\u0131, ne\u015fe kahkaha b\u00fct\u00fcn heyecan\u0131 ve h\u0131z\u0131yla s\u00fcr\u00fcyordu bir \u015fey fark edilmemi\u015flikle\u2026 Tek \u015feride inen yolda bir an d\u0131\u015far\u0131 bakan organizat\u00f6r durumunda olan gen\u00e7lerden biri bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 ile ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7eviri\u015fi bir oldu; kaza olmu\u015f gen\u00e7 \u00e7ocu\u011fun bedeni gazete ile \u00f6rt\u00fclm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc, b\u00fcy\u00fck bir ihtimal bu d\u00fcnyay\u0131 terk etmi\u015fti \u00e7ocuk\u2026<\/p>\n
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Birka\u00e7 an evvel g\u00fclen gen\u00e7 k\u0131z, birka\u00e7 an sonra a\u011flamaya ba\u015flad\u0131, \u201cben niye bakt\u0131m ki\u201d diye\u2026 Ne m\u00fczik kald\u0131, ne e\u011flence, eller yere indi, s\u00f6zler sukut etti, diller konu\u015fmaz oldu, g\u00f6zler bu\u011fuland\u0131\u2026 So\u011fukluk y\u00fczleri gerdi, ac\u0131 akt\u0131 g\u00f6zlerden, g\u00f6zler birbirine bakamad\u0131 yere indi; konu\u015fan sadece \u00f6l\u00fcmd\u00fc, etraf\u0131 kaplayansa \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn sessizli\u011fi\u2026<\/p>\n
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Hayat dolu canl\u0131l\u0131k \u00f6l\u00fcm dolu sessizli\u011fe d\u00f6nd\u00fc, insanlar ayn\u0131 insan, otob\u00fcs ayn\u0131 otob\u00fcs, yol ayn\u0131 yol; az \u00f6nceki halle \u015fimdiki hal aras\u0131nda do\u011fu ile bat\u0131, siyahla beyaz, d\u00fcnya ile ahiret kadar fark vard\u0131\u2026 <\/p>\n
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Kazan\u0131n oldu\u011fu yolun \u00fcst taraf\u0131 mezarl\u0131kt\u0131 zaten, son dura\u011f\u0131 ac\u0131 bir hat\u0131rlat\u0131\u015ft\u0131 ya\u015fanan, unutuluyor olsa da hi\u00e7 unutulmayacak, \u015fuurun alt katmanlar\u0131na derin bir yol a\u00e7acakt\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcnen sahne\u2026 Belki yine g\u00fclecek, yine e\u011flenecek, yine \u015fark\u0131lar s\u00f6yleyecek fakat o derin \u00f6l\u00fcm s\u0131z\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 b\u00fct\u00fcn\u00fcyle silemeyecekti, silinmeyecekti ruhun ruhta \u00e7ekti\u011fi foto\u011fraf; i\u015fte geldik gidiyoruz\u2026<\/p>\n
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Aldat\u0131c\u0131 oyunlar, cezp edici zevkler dudaktaki su gibi kalacakt\u0131 sonsuzluk susuzlu\u011fu kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda\u2026 Kar\u015f\u0131 konulmaz \u00f6l\u00fcms\u00fczl\u00fck iste\u011fi hi\u00e7 s\u00f6nmeyecek bir ate\u015fti kalbin orta yerinde\u2026 Yan\u0131lt\u0131c\u0131 zevkleri s\u00f6nd\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc \u00f6l\u00fcm ger\u00e7e\u011fi, ya\u015fayan sadece \u00f6l\u00fcm ger\u00e7e\u011fiydi hayat yolunun tam orta yerinde\u2026<\/p>\n
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Ceset gazetelerle \u00f6rt\u00fclebilirdi, \u00f6l\u00fcm ise hayat yolu \u00fczerinde ne zaman \u00e7\u0131kaca\u011f\u0131 belli olmayan \u00f6l\u00fcms\u00fcz bir ger\u00e7ekti\u2026 G\u00fclen gen\u00e7ler a\u011fl\u0131yordu, neye a\u011fl\u0131yorlard\u0131 ki biraz \u00f6nce \u00f6len gence mi, zevklerin kaybolmas\u0131na m\u0131, bir g\u00fcn kendi ba\u015flar\u0131na gelecek olana m\u0131? Gelecek olan bir g\u00fcn gelecekti; g\u00f6rd\u00fckleri kendi gelecekleri miydi? <\/p>\n
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G\u00fclene de geliyordu \u00f6l\u00fcm, a\u011flayana da, hayat ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan bu yana da gelmedi\u011fi yoktu; yolun ortas\u0131na ans\u0131z\u0131n \u00e7\u0131k\u0131veriyordu b\u00f6yle gazete k\u00e2\u011f\u0131tlar\u0131yla sar\u0131l\u0131 olarak\u2026 Ertesi g\u00fcn\u00fc gazete s\u00fctunlar\u0131nda ka\u00e7 s\u00fctuna haber olmu\u015ftu, onunsa silinmez harflerle kaz\u0131nm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 kalbinin b\u00fcy\u00fck s\u00fctunlar\u0131na\u2026<\/p>\n
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G\u00fcn ak\u015fama d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015f, yol bitmek \u00fczereydi o ise hala suskun, a\u011flamakl\u0131 bo\u015f bak\u0131yordu \u015fehrin ko\u015fu\u015fturmalar\u0131na, insanlar\u0131n ba\u011f\u0131rt\u0131lar\u0131na, trafi\u011fin tela\u015fl\u0131 ak\u0131\u015f\u0131na\u2026 G\u00fcnle birlikte bitmi\u015fti, yar\u0131nda do\u011fmak \u00fczere.<\/p>\n
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17.08.2009 L\u0130SEY\u0130 B\u0130T\u0130R\u0130P \u00dcniversiteli olma heyecan\u0131, gen\u00e7lik enerjisi ve sarho\u015flu\u011fu ile g\u00fcle oynaya eve d\u00f6nmek \u00fczere otob\u00fcse binildi, unutuldu bile g\u00fcn\u00fcn yorgunlu\u011fu, biraz da ne\u015felenmek laz\u0131md\u0131, arabada \u00e7alan m\u00fczi\u011fe e\u015flik edilmeye ba\u015fland\u0131, haydi eller havaya\u2026 Birka\u00e7 ki\u015fi ile ba\u015flayan m\u00fczi\u011fe tempo tutma gittik\u00e7e geni\u015fledi, eskimeye y\u00fcz tutmu\u015f otob\u00fcs h\u0131zland\u0131k\u00e7a artt\u0131; dillerde \u015fark\u0131n\u0131n s\u00f6zleri, eller ayn\u0131 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[9],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[138],"class_list":["post-85410","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-yazarlar"],"yoast_head":"\n